Hardly a day passes without there being a story about a child who was at the receiving end of bullying – and it can have terrible consequences.
When we look at the problem of bullying, it’s important to do it from both sides. Why are some kids the targets of bullies – and why do some kids feel that they need to bully others?
Let’s start with the kids being bullied. How can martial arts help them?
There are a few things that can make a child the target of bullies. It’s not the child’s fault, but bullies generally pick out kids are vulnerable or different.
These vulnerabilities might include:
– A lack of self-confidence or feelings of unworthiness
– Non-conformity or something that makes a child different
– Lack of ability to defend themselves
These are all issues that studying martial arts can address. Let’s take them one at a time.
Some kids are naturally self-confident, and others aren’t. A child who has a high level of self-confidence is unlikely to be targeted by bullies. Why? Because there’s nothing the bully can gain by going after them. Kids with a strong sense of their own worth will brush off attacks by bullies because they are not concerned with what a bully thinks of them.
A child who lacks confidence, on the other hand, is easy to target. A bully knows that by picking on someone who doesn’t understand their own worth, they can feel superior. They’ll get a reaction. Kids are creatures of habit, too. Every kid wonders if they’re “normal” and/or questions whether they are “good enough,” and sometimes, a kid who’s different is bullied because they make the bully feel self-conscious or uncertain. The bully bullies to reassure themselves to try to rid themselves of that very same uncertainty they have of themselves!
Finally, some kids are more aggressive than others. They might get their sense of self-worth from being physically dominant. It’s easy to dominate someone who can’t defend themselves, and so kids who aren’t physically strong or coordinated will sometimes be targeted.
What does any of this have to do with martial arts?
Well, kids who study martial arts:
– Learn to trust themselves – they know they can achieve their goals
– Understand that being different doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t be confident
– Gain significantly improved control of their bodies and movements
– Learn how to leverage their body weight to defend themselves
In life, there are no guarantees, so does studying martial arts mean a child will never get bullied? No, but it will lead to a child gaining confidence in who they are through experiencing for themselves that with hard work and a positive attitude they can accomplish anything they put their mind to, leaving them with no need for the validation of those who choose to bully. Armed with that confidence, they instantly become a far less attractive target for bullies.